Nina Halim

I believe I am someone who can take constructive criticism. Just as I am always honest with my friends, I would prefer them to return such honesty towards me.  I believe real friends are not there to agree to everything you do or say. I want friends who will point it out when I’m wrong. That’s what real friends do for one another – to look out for another. Segmen jaga hati while your friend suffers in the long run? Not my style. My real friends know that I appreciate feedback and advice. But the essence of it all is how it’s being done. Diplomatically.

But that’s for friends. What about the general public?

I would say the same. I welcome your feedback, advice and criticism. I believe it’s part and parcel of improving, progressing and essential for personal or professional growth. But I would also say the same thing about how it should be done. Diplomatically and constructively.

We recently received a sarcastic comment on awan-awan.com about the fact that the ‘chinese salad’ we ate on the program is not halal. I appreciate the fact that it was being pointed out. Sometimes, as humans, we are not as careful. But when one wants to point out a sensitive issue, one should be equally sensitive in one’s delivery. Otherwise, the good intention gets lost in execution. It gets diminished, brother (or sister or whoever you are). I suggest for some self reflection before criticizing other people. I believe an Ustaz/Ustazah would not use such a tone if they were to highlight this issue to us.

My business partner (a new brother in Islam) said, “These are the words of an extremist. It is exactly this kind of Muslims who give other Muslims a bad name throughout the world”. And I agree. It is equivalent to being a terrorist. Because you fight for your beliefs the wrong way. And at the end of the day, your belief is your belief. Other people are entitled to theirs. If you are careful about what you eat, then that’s good for you alhamdullilah. But don’t impose on other people. However, if you feel it is your duty and responsibility to remind others, alhamdullilah as well. But do it the right way. Not by dropping a half baked one-liner.

You want to talk about values? Malay and Islamic values? With all due respect, please gaze into the mirror and look for ‘ethics’, ‘etiquette’ and ‘manners’ in the reflection first. Pada pendapat saya, cara awak  berdakwah is so salah.

You want to talk about halal or not. First of all, it’s rojak. If you know the ingredients, you know there’s no pork, lard or alcohol in it (unless I didn’t catch on some trend of rum in rojak). I also doubt the ah pek is cooking his pork filled lunch with the same utensils used for the rojak (like he can’t buy his lunch from the dozen other stalls there). But I could be wrong. This is where I’m not as was-was (wary) as you. This is where we are different.

But if you want to get paranoid like that, then wow we should avoid everything else as well. Like the Malay lady who sells nasi padang without the halal certificate. Because you never know, right. Don’t you find it bewildering the double standards? Naturally, Muslims in general do not ask for a halal certificate when they eat at a normal stall run by Malay ladies. But there are people who goes to Badoque (which is run by Arab and Malay boys) and ask for their halal certificate. (in Sin Po Poh mode) Eh… chi kuai. Why ah? Boys are not as particular as old Malay ladies is it?

FYI, an Ustaz once told me you can eat vegetarian food from a Chinese stall if there really isn’t any other choice around you. Which, I gather, means you can actually eat food from such a place but to be politically correct and to safeguard yourself (from doing wrong or other people giving you the look), you just don’t if there’s halal stalls around. Well, I can tell you the vegetarians are even more paranoid than we are about meat and its derivatives. Another Ustaz also said not to trust every halal certificate you see. Probably half of the businesses that have the certificates are pretending to be halal. And this dude is on the committee yo. What do you then say about that? Who are we to trust then? Then, don’t buy any soft drinks, don’t buy coffee from the coffee chains, don’t take snacks in a pack. Because 1 out 5 of them probably contains non halal substances. I know this because my mom has a thing for forwarded emails with such information. At the very least, I think I am a little bit safer that way because I am not the soft drink, snack or candy sort of person. I eat home cooked food usually and only take water, instant coffee and Pokka green tea. So unless you found some lard derivatives in these items, I’m not going to be on guilt/panic mode at this point.

I can say your comment is about the same caliber as the newspaper running Norfasarie’s blog picture of her pregnant tummy on front page. Tabloid material should remain on tabloids. No offense but that’s my personal take on that. Islam says it is wrong to publicly embarrass someone even if that person has done wrong. But that’s another drama altogether. And I am not one to preach.

So dear Anonymous, if you were really sincere about it, you should have written to us personally. We have received many feedback about awan-awan.com. Even about the controversial expletive in our program title. Whether it’s positive or negative, we always take it in good stride. We will always answer in good faith. You may not receive our reply immediately but you will definitely receive it. Whatever the inclination of the feedback may be, we truly appreciate and respect  the people who take the time and effort to write to us personally because it reflects their sincerity. Sincere people leave their names and contact details for us to write back. If we have done wrong, we would do our best to correct it. Perhaps it was not politically correct having eaten that rojak on our program but you weren’t right either in your way. An expert wouldn’t have adapted your method. But if you did turn out to be an expert, then I fear for the community.

It is very easy to criticize a public figure, especially behind a fake domain like halalke@mungkintak.com. But just like any other incidents, I take this in stride. There’s always going to be something else if it’s not another. It’s something I’ve long accepted as it is something I can’t run away from. Even if I didn’t have my own fame, I was born to celebrity parents. I grew up with people reporting to my parents on my moves that I was starting to believe my Dad was so paranoid on keeping his good name that he hired people to spy on his children. I can take criticism. I can take it if you pick on me. I can live with other people’s lies too. I can live with hilarious defamation as well. The only way I’ve actually achieved ubiquity is through other people’s grand tales while I was (on numerous occasions) in another country altogether. Apparently there are people who look exactly like me in Singapore.

So that’s my personal take on Anonymous special. My professional take? /ignore.

Buah cempedak di luar pagar
Ambil galah tolong jolokkan
Saya budak baru belajar
Kalau salah tolong tunjukkan

Tapi kalau nak tolong tu, nak menegur, biar ada cara sikit. Kerana kita orang Melayu, seharusnya ada budi bicara. Sekian terima kasih.

ps. Oh and you don’t have to go telling my mom about this retort. She knows already

Image via Bamshad

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1. 1 decade later
2. First Days